Take A Peek     |   home
July 3, 2000 Humans Are Viruses   |   July 5, 2000 House Mates From Hell Part Deux   |   July 15, 2000 Interesting Sighting in Princeton, NJ   |   July 24, 2000 What it takes to make a person believe in God   |   July 24, 2000 Diet Time   |   July 25, 2000 Painful Shoes and Americanism   |   July 26, 2000 Agitation   |   July 27, 2000 Agitation Part II - More grief on those freakin' liberals   |   Bill Clinton Sign...   |   July 31, 2000 Disturbing Findings   |   August 1, 2000 My Current State of Mind   |   August 3, 2000 Inspiration   |   August 4, 2000 Infidelity   |   August 7, 2000 Dieting Melancholy   |   August 14, 2000 Note to Self   |   August 19, 2000 Sparks and Slim Shady   |   Road Runner Slaughtered   |   September 4, 2000 Labor Day
August 1, 2000 My Current State of Mind
I am an existentialist.

I have become a pessimist and a cynic.

This does not mean my words are without value, nor does it mean that I am a sad person.  A different perspective does not necessarily alter a person's emotional state.

These are my beliefs.

People are non-omniscient beings that think they are all knowing, while believing that everybody else is either wrong or intellectually inferior.  Each person has a certain set of values and morals that they abide by, and even when they act against their conscience, (s) he is able to justify him/herself so that (s) he will allow him/herself feel guilt free, and morally fit.  Everybody is right, and nobody is wrong.  The struggle for acknowledgment in being absolutely correct and righteous, and attaining agreement by all causes human turmoil.  That is the foundation of most human conflicts.  That is what causes rebellions, and new political ideals.  That is what causes prolonged argumentation between friends, and that is what makes each and every one of us decide who our enemies are.

Looking at only the country that I belong to, I see a nation that idealizes immoral behavior.  Pop culture tells us that sexual promiscuity is a good thing.  Although “serial monogamy” (coined by Humberto) may not be seen as being promiscuous, but the fact remains - one person engaging sexual/romantic relations with several other people within his/her life.

People look to each other for their identity.  People look to the TV/media for images of beauty and hoping to catch a trace or a shadow of who they want to be.  The greater population engages in sexual activities because it is a decadent and glamorous activity without truly understanding the repercussions of such actions, be it emotional or physical.  Even if these factors are understood, then it is safe to say that the active populace does not care of those repercussions.  All they do know is the images shown on TV, the actions of others, and their own physical pleasure.

Because of this general stupidity, lack of independent identity, I can honestly say that I half-heartedly wish that AIDS research would just end along with other STD studies.  These diseases can act as a means of Darwinism of the 20th and 21st century.  It will filter the morally unfit and allow a more credible group of individuals to persist in the fight for what is a just and moral society.  The struggle is still futile, but at least the credibility of argument will be elevated to a class of people who do have the right to speak.  

As for me, I've decided to follow Valerie Sors/Sonnenschein' (in Sunshine) lesson.  Personally, I see art, fashion, and theater as beautiful things.  I intend to spend my time appreciating those things and let people fend for themselves.  Let everybody make decisions for themselves, and let them suffer from the repercussions of their decisions.  Do no let your heart bleed for their suffering.  It is deserved.  And there is no point in trying to make people understand the error of their ways.  Every last one of them are morally just in his/her own mind; it's futile and senseless to make them change that perception.

I think, in general, people should just do whatever they want and whatever they think is right because in the end, things will catch up to them.  It is imperative, however, not to let your heart bleed while they suffer.